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February 11, 2013 / Brittany Hendrick

H-E-N-D-R-I-C-K — No ‘S’, no ‘X’

For a few years now, a series of interesting search engine terms have brought people to my blog. However — and I know this for a fact — the reader never discovers the information he’s looking for. But given the events that have happened in my life recently, there is a funny coincidence between the search terms that are unrelated to me and… me! I can’t believe forgot about this unfortunate story prior to my nose surgery, until one of the searched items popped up the other day.

These first came to my attention in 2009, when I migrated the blog to WordPress (I am a statistics and analyses nerd. Love this stuff.):

brittany hendricks nose job

brittany hendricks las vegas

brittany hendricks stripper

This struck me as funny… mainly because I am not Brittany Hendricks. And though my name is misspelled and mispronounced even by those who know me well, I was certain that no one suspected I lived in Vegas and was employed as an exotic dancer. And, at the time, I had not undergone surgery yet.

What could so many people out there possibly want to know about a Vegas stripper named Brittany Hendricks who had a nose job? What were these people looking for?

Curious to know the story behind my almost-namesake and what made her so interesting to the World Wide Web, I searched it myself and

OOOOHHH MY GOD.

To summarize, Brittany Hendricks was a hard-lifin’ woman who sought the services of a well-known New York plastic surgeon to perform a rhinoplasty and breast augmentation on her. The night before the surgery, Hendricks, the doc and his girlfriend allegedly hit the meth pipe, got freaky, caught a couple hours of shut-eye, and went through with the procedure the next morning. High.

In turn, the doc fucked up Hendricks’ nose and she sued him. A lot of other patients drew lawsuits, too, apparently.

It’s easily arguable that Hendricks’ credibility is, errrr, less than favorable. Then again, what do you make of a guy who drives a Porsche replete with a vanity plate that reads BUNNYMAKR, leaves behind gauze inside another patient and remarks it was “…nothing crazy, just some gauze I left”, and makes grandiose statements such as, “The [lawsuit] is going well — I will prevail!”

I will prevail?!

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!! That’s my favorite blob of ego-narcissism — and there were many — that pooped out of his mouth. The only thing missing was: “You asked me if I have a god complex? Let me tell you something: I AM God!”

Anyway, it’s a harrowing tale of Crazy meets Crazy, and it’s still a hot topic to this day. I hope the poor lady got her nose fixed properly, though. Even if she was a drug-addled dumbass. Brittany Hendrick, No ‘S’, No ‘X’, is grateful that her doctor did a good job… but now wonders what kind of car he drives.

Aaannnd I think what Google searchers are really interested in are before/after pictures of Brittany Hendricks. Maybe that’s just me.

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8 Comments

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  1. Brittany Hendricks / Mar 22 2016 9:28 pm

    I’m Brittany Hendricks, the former exotic dancer/ meth addict. My nose looks better now then it did after Jacobs destroyed it, however it does not look as good as it did before the unnecessary surgery. Dr. Dean Toriumi fixed it for about 60 grand, between two surgeries. I still need a 3rd surgery for hopes to nasal breath again. Happy to hear that Brittany Hendrick (with no “s” or “x”) rhinoplasty turned out great. I’m on face book if u want to see before and after pics.
    Brittany Hendricks

    Like

    • Anonymous / Mar 22 2016 9:36 pm

      On facebook it’s actually
      Brittany Legend-Hendricks
      If u really want to seem I’ll have to add you.
      Blessings,
      Brittany

      Like

    • Brittany Hendrick / Mar 22 2016 10:22 pm

      Ooooh wow, hello! I am so sorry about your ordeal. 😦 To go through that rollercoaster… it’s unfathomable. Anyone with horror stories like yours, it’s unbelievable that they actually happen. Ugh, that egomaniacal, narcissistic, power-hungry fratbro. I had a couple of his “I’m too sexy for my scrubs” photos in this blog post, but I took them down because, just my luck, I’d get sued for using without permission. BUNNYMAKR’s Porsche isn’t going to pay for itself!

      I am so glad you’re doing well! $60k to fix?! Geez, the guy couldn’t cut you a deal, after your traumatic experience?

      Your story is compelling. What about trying out for ‘Botched,’ on the E! Network, for the third revision? I don’t know how it works, if you’d have to pony up your own money. Or do stipulations from your legal case prevent you from doing things like that?

      Also, your timing is uncanny. I was 90% happy with my nose, but it didn’t quite heal correctly… as it’s prone to happen… or maybe my ENT (Dr. Peter J. Abramson, a very nice man) was a little too conservative — mmmmmaybe because I busted his balls by saying, “Don’t make me look not like myself!” In any case, he seemed genuinely surprised that “something went wrong in the womb.” Even one of the OR nurses was surprised, and remarked, “He’s such a perfectionist!” So, MY LIFE, something went awry, somewhere, the first time around.

      And, hey, I get it — noses are hard!

      The initial result wasn’t anything to cry over, but I thought, “Let’s try again, why not.” I had a revision (relatively simple rasping) last week, and the cast came off today. So far, so good! The truth will be revealed (through my thin skin), once swelling goes down. My takeaway: Do your septo-turbinoplasty and rhinoplasty as two separate surgeries.

      I am not on Facebook at the moment, but when I return to it (someday), I’ll look you up!

      Again, I am happy that things turned out better for you. I hope you get your third revision soon. Let me know when it happens and how it goes!

      –B

      p.s. You don’t really have to answer my questions if you don’t want to. They come from a place of disbelief and may be rhetorical.

      Like

  2. Brittany Hendrick / Dec 15 2013 3:43 am

    Hey, nosy, unhappy asshole loser who has nothing better to do but cyberstalk (GEE, I wonder who you could be. HMMM.), I have some advice for you — and I know you’ll see this because:

    a.) you’re inordinately obsessed with my sister and, thereby, me

    b.) you have visited my blog several times already (I’m so flattered! [That’s sarcasm, by the way. Really, you’re creepy… and kinda dumb, too.])

    c.) you will keep coming back to my blog in hopes of… well, we’re not quite sure what you hope to find or accomplish… other than making yourself look like a sad, mentally unhealthy individual with a baseless vendetta.

    But, I digress. Back to the advice. In no particular order:

    1.) The Internet: learn about it!

    2.) Be honest with your parents. We like them.

    3.) Find a new church to attend. The one you’ve been going to doesn’t appear to be working out well for your, um… spirituality. In fact, you’re a really mean person. The inner ugliness has seeped outside — it’s aged you to the point of being unrecognizable.

    4.) Never piss off a writer. You’re in my territory now, Bub — I can be meaner. And I can do it while maintaining my beauty because writers are truth-tellers, and the truth is beautiful. Or, to quote one of my favorite poets, John Keats, “Beauty is truth, truth beauty.” But you wouldn’t know anything about that, now, would you.

    You arethisclose to having me geld what little is left of your manhood. In other words, on your quest for condemnatory literature, I’ll really give you something to read about: yourself.

    5.) Stop wasting your time. It’s been 12 years, bobo. You aren’t going to find any damning dirt on my sister. Not anything out of the ordinary anyway, and nothing any worse than what you’ve done in your life (that’s for damn sure).

    You are so lost, I bet you don’t even know WHY you do this anymore. Wanna know how bad it is? Wanna know how unhinged from reality you are? WITHOUT EVEN TRYING, I caught you sitting in the parking lot at my sister’s workplace a few years ago. That’s fucked up, yo. Do you even realize that? Do you think that is normal adult behavior? You’re only embarrassing yourself — and you can’t blame it on youth.

    6.) Right-click in the margin of this page. Click on “Print”. Where it says “Pages”, click the second radio button; type the numbers “3,4″ in the box. Where is says “Copies”, type the number “2″ in the box. Print. Now you are ready to tattle on me.

    Because you’re a whiny little bitch-boy who doesn’t understand the concept of “consequence of one’s own actions”, you will undoubtedly run crying to your attorney, just as you have done in the past: “Waaahhhh! Wuk what Bwittany wote about me! Dat hoit mah feewings!”

    Even though you [redacted offense], [redacted offense], [redacted offense], [redacted offense], and generally don’t keep your end of the bargain on ANYTHING, you’ll find a way to shirk responsibility for your unpleasant, dishonest actions and make it into how YOU’VE been wronged.

    I think it’s hilarrrrious that a guy who has boldly committed numerous abhorrent offenses with smug egotism, without regard for the law or anyone’s feelings (It’s called sociopathy — learn about it!) can’t take a little bitchslap in return. Doesn’t feel so good to be bullied at length, unnecessarily, huh, does it, dumbfuck.

    So, go on. Add this to your fledgling file that includes pictures of my sister doing regular, mundane stuff, like working to support her family while attending UGA, as well as old photos of her from before you even knew each other. What are you hanging onto those photos for anyway? Sick bastard.

    Cheerio!

    Like

  3. Anonymous / Feb 13 2013 11:38 pm

    No, but then, I’m not gay.

    Like

    • Brittany Hendrick / Feb 14 2013 9:54 pm

      Even if you were gay, you still gave the preferred answer. Though, in one of the articles I linked, it is quoted that the disgraced doc is well-endowed. Oh well. Our loss!

      Like

  4. Danielle / Feb 11 2013 9:11 pm

    What?! No pictures?!?

    Like

    • Brittany Hendrick / Feb 11 2013 9:27 pm

      Nope! Pretty sure I found one in Google Images, but it’s small and the lighting looks dim… probably on purpose. Other than that, to my knowledge, nothing else exists.

      But more importantly: would you hit it? What makes people think that was a rhetorical question?

      Like

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